There's a problem with classic novels: they're inherently old. The language is archaic, the humor doesn't translate to modern times, and the ideas have been reused so often they're no longer novel (pardon the pun).
Take, for instance, this passage from The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, lifted from a random page I opened to in my Mark Twain: Four complete novels hardcover.
That night we went down the lightning-rod a little after ten, and took one of the candles along, and listened under the window-hole, and heard Jim snoring; so we pitched it in, and it didn't wake him.
That passage is about one tenth of the paragraph. English teachers don't like to admit this, but Twain is hard for modern kids to read. Furthermore, he teaches kids grammar that is no longer considered proper. Let's reproduce that paragraph as if a child wrote it and I am the teacher grading it.
That night we went down the lightning-rod (remove the hyhen, -1 pt) a little after ten, and (comma splice, -2 pts) took one of the candles along, and (comma splice, -2 pts) listened under the window-hole (remove the hyphen, -1 pt), and (comma splice, -2 pts) heard Jim snoring; so we pitched it in, and (comma splice, -2 pts) it didn't wake him. (Run-on sentence, -2 pts)
Hey, at least the kid knows the proper use of a semicolon.
No wonder kids never want to read. It's hard enough to get through the plots of these books with Cliff's Notes, but to decipher these sentences while doing it takes more time and energy than you realize.
Fortunately, someone has come up with a solution to keep our youths interested in the classics. It's all about knowing your audience. If you can take a classic and update it just a little bit, then you might be able to motivate your child to spend those hours reading and understanding the text.
From chroniclebooks.com
Pride and Prejudice and Zombies features the original text of Jane Austen's beloved novel with all-new scenes of bone-crunching zombie action. As our story opens, a mysterious plague has fallen upon the quiet English village of Meryton—and the dead are returning to life! Feisty heroine Elizabeth Bennet is determined to wipe out the zombie menace, but she's soon distracted by the arrival of the haughty and arrogant Mr. Darcy. What ensues is a delightful comedy of manners with plenty of civilized sparring between the two young lovers—and even more violent sparring on the blood-soaked battlefield as Elizabeth wages war against hordes of flesh-eating undead. Complete with 20 illustrations in the style of C. E. Brock (the original illustrator of Pride and Prejudice), this insanely funny expanded edition will introduce Jane Austen's classic novel to new legions of fans.
Pride and Prejudice and Zombies features the original text of Jane Austen's beloved novel with all-new scenes of bone crunching zombie action.
About the Author
JANE AUSTEN is the author of Sense and Sensibility, Persuasion, Mansfield Park, and other masterpieces of English literature. SETH GRAHAME-SMITH is the author of How to Survive a Horror Movie and The Big Book of Porn. He lives in Los Angeles.
There's no better way to get your kid reading the classics. Until they make this into a movie starring Anne Hatheway and Robert England. Then they'll just rent the movie and pretend they read the book.
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