They call him "Bitch Tits"

There is a scene at the end of Johnny Dangerously* where the titular character, former mobster and current pet store owner Johnny tells a boy not to go into crime, because crime doesn't pay. He then climbs into one of a procession of stretch limos, sits next to his beautiful wife, and says something like, "well, maybe it pays a little."

*Did you know your last name's an adverb?

I bring this up because Selena Roberts' book on Alex Rodriguez apparently accuses A-Rod of using steroids since high school. Also, there are reports that he used much longer than he previously admitted to, including time with the Yankees.

All of this was meant to turn this:

into this:

 

I would like to point the money Alex Rodriguez is owed by the Yankees, courtesy of Cot's.

Alex Rodriguez 3b
10 years/$275M (2008-17)

• 10 years/$275M (2008-17)
  • re-signed by Yankees as a free agent 12/13/07
  • $10M signing bonus ($2M paid upon approval, $1M paid each Jan. 15, 2009-2013, $3M paid Jan. 15, 2014)
  • 08:$27M, 09:$32M, 10:$32M, 11:$31M, 12:$29M, 13:$28M, 14:$25M, 15:$21M, 16:$20M, 17:$20M
  • $30M marketing agreement based on home run milestones ($6M each for reaching 660, 714, 755 and tying and breaking major league HR record)
  • no-trade protection
  • perks: may purchase 4 best available season tickets for 2008, 4 Legends Suite or comparable season tickets for 2009-17
  • Texas obligated to fund $9M as part of deferred compensation provision in previous contract (to be paid with interest in $3M increments in 2008, 2009 & 2010)

 

That's right. Including this season, the Yankees owe A-Rod $258 million, with more if he hits home run milestones.

But crime doesn't pay.

Also, the 2005 Yankees gave A-Rod a nickname: Bitch Tits. Which marks the first time I've used the term "Bitch Tits" since my first post.