Join a cult!
There are two kinds of cults. The first is the kind where you get to have some kind of belief that completely ostracizes you from normal society. It leads you to appear on television acting even more insane than normal. It could be the belief that your fearless leader is a descendant of Chirst, or that he is some Christ-like figure, or is Christ himself. As long as he has the ability to make you kill, or give your underage daughters to creepy older men, or give up all your earthly possessions.
The second kind is where you let someone else do all that for you, because you've killed yourself.
I'm advocating that you join the first kind of cult. What's the fun of having an excuse to act like a nut if you're dead? Ever want to jump on a couch like a lunatic on national TV? Ever want to eat nothing but lima beans? Ever want to sell all your earthly possessions and move into a permanent summer camp? Or follow the orders of a deranged genius intent on killing the rich and famous? Or sing "Firewoman"? There's no time like the present.
If you're lucky, the cult you've joined slowly becomes mainstream. Then you're at the forefront of history, simply because you followed some guy who had visions of God while in a cave or decided to write his own addition to the Bible where Jesus will make his return in Missouri.
It doesn't matter what cult you join, be it Scientology, Promise Keepers, or the Green Party. That's a personal choice. Just don't become a fan of Lost. That's the most disgusting cult of all.
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